We all go through suffering of some type. Mine started when I was six. Being sent to Boarding School, away from my parent's caused me a lot of heartache. I didn't realize this until recent years. I went from feeling numb most of my life, to feeling anger and then bitterness towards God and then my parents. Trudging through this with my counselor has brought me to acknowledge my pain as significant and allow God to bring healing, and give me the humility to forgive and the power to love.
My parents and I are starting our relationships on a new level, starting now. I want us to make the most of the time we have left. As I visited them with the kids this last week, I was saddened by how much older they seemed to me. But I'm holding on to the hope that the Lord will allow us to make up for "lost time."
We had some good talks each night I was there. On the last night, I asked them to tell me how they felt when they sent me to Boarding School. The tears started on both sides of the room as they responded. They shared about how it was so hard for them, they had to make some huge sacrifices for the gospel to advance. I know they felt like they were making the best decision for me. It was the best and only option they had at the time.
Then Dad shared about the current state of Burkina Faso, where they served for 30 years! He told me that the gospel is spreading so rapidly there, enough for missionaries to pull out because they are no longer needed. Unreached people groups are being reached, by other Africans! Pastors are being taught in seminaries, by their fellow Africans! Churches are being started and led by the National church. Dad was so excited as he shared all of this. And then he said, "so, Diane, the sacrifice you made to go away from home, so that we could do the work here, was NOT in vain! Take joy in that!" And I do. I would do it all over again, knowing how much God used Mom and Dad's ministry to advance His kingdom. I got to play a part in that! I don't feel bitterness anymore, not even regrets. The Lord's healing balm is so gentle and yet so powerful. Praise God!
2 comments:
What an awesome story! God is so faithful, sometimes it just takes many years to see why He did what He did. I'm so glad you are healing and that you and your parents have this precious time. Your post brought tears to my eyes.
thank you, Lord, for healing! thanks for being vulnerable and sharing. i'm so glad for you and your folks to have had this reconciliation!
Post a Comment