Tuesday, July 24, 2012

How Do I Choose Rest in This Mess?

My living room is a disaster: two loads of laundry ready to be folded, books lined up on the TV. cabinet and side tables and chairs (for a pretend library), couch cushions on the floor (pet-peeve!), a dozen stuffed animals on the couch facing the same direction (for story time at the library), tupper of legoes on the floor, X-wing and Snow Speeder on the ottomon... Don't even get me started on the girl's room, there is not an exposed inch of carpet to be found.

All of this greets me as I make my chicory drink and prepare for having a quiet time. Of course the only place to sit is in the kitchen, where the LOUD hum of the dishwasher rings in my ears and the kids eventually join me to drink hot cocoa, which is being sloshed all around. But as I sit and listen to their play, I can't help but enjoy their zest for life. They could care less about the mess (they just keep adding to it), why can't I just let it go and relax?

I get stuck in this place every day. I just want to get to a place of cleanliness so that I can relax and find peace. Even when I do get those things done, by that time I'm so distracted and I find more things that need to get done. Therefore, I miss that time to sit with the Lord and find rest.
By then, I'm so much "in control" that it's hard for me to hear His voice.

He's been teaching me over the past few years to let some things go. I'm never going to be done with laundry or dishes or organizing closets and the paper pile. I've started to accept this, though it's a daily choice. Now, I feel like He's trying to teach me to find rest in this place of disorganization. The state of my heart does not have to match up with the state of my house/circumstances! If my house doesn't feel restful because of it's uncleanliness that does not mean I cannot find rest in my Lord.

So today was a big test for me. Instead of having the kids clean up the mess before I could sit with the Lord. I chose to sit in the center of the chaos. Asking Him to meet me in this place, I opened my Bible to Psalm 91. "He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High will abide in the shadow of the Almighty..." That was just the beginning! Intermittent between answering questions and moving 3 times around the house to be able to get a little more silence, I truly felt the Lord's presence with me. I am under His Wing! I was able to commit this day and this mess to Him and ask that He help me to live by His Spirit, with joy rather than despair, peace rather than anxiety, unconditional love rather than conditional!

Each day and sometimes each moment we are faced with the choice to choose rest or not. It doesn't matter what the situation is, we can find rest under the shadow of Almighty God if we CHOOSE to dwell in Him! We have to ignore the distractions and choose to listen and believe. It's so difficult and we will fail many times, but we can look back and remember the times that we have chosen rest. We can rejoice in those times and God will meet us every time!

Happy resting!!